Now I'm thirty, should I have my s**t together?

What does having your shit together involve and is it possible to achieve it by the time you're thirty, or will we be aiming for this our whole lives? 

For me, a small move towards having my shit together recently is doing the washing up before I go to bed (at 9.30 because I’m not in my twenties anymore and I’m tired!), as there’s nothing better than getting out of bed in the morning to a tidy home. Reading this back to myself makes me realise how my life has changed. 

In August I turned thirty, this didn’t raise any concerns. 

I’m not the type who needed to accomplish particular goals by the the time I reached this age i.e buy a house, get married. The latter ended up happening naturally - as already mentioned in a recent post I’d never envisioned getting married until my now husband proposed. But un-expected suprises are the best.

As a recent graduate all I really wanted to do by the time I reached thirty was graduate and with a job. I’m not 22, I’ve started my climb up the career ladder later than most so having a job when I graduated was important. I knew I would be nearly thirty and needed to get my act together. Yes, I loved being a student but gaining a job was the reason I went to university in the first place. 

Turning thirty for many is a milestone; some dread it, some revel in it. I even saw a guy on Instagram celebrated his thirtieth birthday with 30 drinks in 30 pubs in 30 days. Extravagant!

For myself it was just another birthday celebrated with close family and friends. I’ve never been one to go all out on Birthdays. 

But what has dawned on me recently is what my life should be or feel like now I’m thirty? Am I now a fully fledged grown up? Because to be honest I don’t feel like I’m there yet. 

I don’t own my own home and have only been in full time work for less than a year (since leaving university). This past few weeks, new evidence suggests we are physiologically adults at the age of 25. 

At 25 I still lived at home with my parents and had just left my job to go back to study. I definitely didn’t feel very adult. Yes I worked part time and paid my way but this was a far cry from some others my age. Some were married with children by that age, we all reach these supposed life goals at different periods. Some may feel ready for that commitment others are still enjoying going out drinking with friends and rolling into work with a hangover. I was enjoying the latter and enjoyed every single minute of it. 

But there comes a point when things have to change and planning your future becomes important. 

It’s time to not be hungover on weekends and open that help to buy ISA. 

However, we are constantly under pressure to have life figured out, what’s the best age to get married, buy a home or have a family. When really the majority of us will figure this out at different times in our lives. Why should we follow stereotypes and do as others do? Following suit can often make us feel deflated or envious so I believe it’s great to be different and plan our lives how we want them to be or not to be. 

Getting your shit together involves many aspects, recently I feel productivity is key! Life’s crazy busy for us all. I work a 40+ hour week plus two hour commute there and back and I’m trying to fit exercise into my daily routine too so being productive is currently how I’m getting my life on track. Yes it’s tiring but that’s life and you get out what you put in. 

Carrie Bradshaw said your thirties were to learn the lessons. She’s fictional but correct. By the time you reach thirty you are starting to learn life’s lessons. Mistakes are made, we are human and don’t always get things right the first time, but we learn from them more than we did in our early twenties. 

  

If you don’t have life figured out by the time you're thirty, I’m sure you’re not the only one. Life’s difficult and brilliant and terrible life changing situations are thrown at us that we may have never expected or know how to deal with, but we’re human and continue to learn and grow no matter what age. Small steps to possibly having it all/ my shit together is what I’m aiming for, it’s what we should all aim for. 

ph credit - Trendland
edited using Beautiful Little Mess