Now I'm thirty, should I have my s**t together?

What does having your shit together involve and is it possible to achieve it by the time you're thirty, or will we be aiming for this our whole lives? 

For me, a small move towards having my shit together recently is doing the washing up before I go to bed (at 9.30 because I’m not in my twenties anymore and I’m tired!), as there’s nothing better than getting out of bed in the morning to a tidy home. Reading this back to myself makes me realise how my life has changed. 

In August I turned thirty, this didn’t raise any concerns. 

I’m not the type who needed to accomplish particular goals by the the time I reached this age i.e buy a house, get married. The latter ended up happening naturally - as already mentioned in a recent post I’d never envisioned getting married until my now husband proposed. But un-expected suprises are the best.

As a recent graduate all I really wanted to do by the time I reached thirty was graduate and with a job. I’m not 22, I’ve started my climb up the career ladder later than most so having a job when I graduated was important. I knew I would be nearly thirty and needed to get my act together. Yes, I loved being a student but gaining a job was the reason I went to university in the first place. 

Turning thirty for many is a milestone; some dread it, some revel in it. I even saw a guy on Instagram celebrated his thirtieth birthday with 30 drinks in 30 pubs in 30 days. Extravagant!

For myself it was just another birthday celebrated with close family and friends. I’ve never been one to go all out on Birthdays. 

But what has dawned on me recently is what my life should be or feel like now I’m thirty? Am I now a fully fledged grown up? Because to be honest I don’t feel like I’m there yet. 

I don’t own my own home and have only been in full time work for less than a year (since leaving university). This past few weeks, new evidence suggests we are physiologically adults at the age of 25. 

At 25 I still lived at home with my parents and had just left my job to go back to study. I definitely didn’t feel very adult. Yes I worked part time and paid my way but this was a far cry from some others my age. Some were married with children by that age, we all reach these supposed life goals at different periods. Some may feel ready for that commitment others are still enjoying going out drinking with friends and rolling into work with a hangover. I was enjoying the latter and enjoyed every single minute of it. 

But there comes a point when things have to change and planning your future becomes important. 

It’s time to not be hungover on weekends and open that help to buy ISA. 

However, we are constantly under pressure to have life figured out, what’s the best age to get married, buy a home or have a family. When really the majority of us will figure this out at different times in our lives. Why should we follow stereotypes and do as others do? Following suit can often make us feel deflated or envious so I believe it’s great to be different and plan our lives how we want them to be or not to be. 

Getting your shit together involves many aspects, recently I feel productivity is key! Life’s crazy busy for us all. I work a 40+ hour week plus two hour commute there and back and I’m trying to fit exercise into my daily routine too so being productive is currently how I’m getting my life on track. Yes it’s tiring but that’s life and you get out what you put in. 

Carrie Bradshaw said your thirties were to learn the lessons. She’s fictional but correct. By the time you reach thirty you are starting to learn life’s lessons. Mistakes are made, we are human and don’t always get things right the first time, but we learn from them more than we did in our early twenties. 

  

If you don’t have life figured out by the time you're thirty, I’m sure you’re not the only one. Life’s difficult and brilliant and terrible life changing situations are thrown at us that we may have never expected or know how to deal with, but we’re human and continue to learn and grow no matter what age. Small steps to possibly having it all/ my shit together is what I’m aiming for, it’s what we should all aim for. 

ph credit - Trendland
edited using Beautiful Little Mess

Green Corduroy

Each season both new and old trends return to the catwalk, high street and ultimately our wardrobes. At the moment corduroy seems to be having a moment. Yes corduroy, often seen on elderly gentlemen and Steve Braidy in Sex and the City. If you're a fan of the show you'll remember Miranda's yuppy guilt scene when she invites her new boyfriend to a 'fancy' work event and after asking him if he owns a suit he declares 'Its really nice, it's gold, yeah Corduroy'.
My reaction was somewhat different to Miranda's when I spotted this amazing green pair of cropped, flared corduroy trousers in Zara. I'm currently in desperate need of new clothing and this brilliantly fitting pair have been the perfect edition. I find a cropped trouser often creates a difficult styling challenge.They can sometimes sit awkwardly on your lower leg, but these have been a dream. They fit like a glove and look perfect with slim ankle boots, pumps and heels and work for both a day or night look. They come in Green, Navy and Rust but I felt the green colour-way suited my skin tone better and even though a striking colour, they are still safe if wearing for work with an oversized jumper.
Today I've teamed them with this overtly loud candy-striped shirt from Monki, heeled ankle boots and a trench coat because it's the North and obviously its raining.

Zara Cords | Moni Skirt | ASOS Trench | Topshop Boots | Zara Bag

Colour co-ordination trends I'm loving right now

The night I met my now husband I was wearing red shoes, red bag, red tube top (yes a tube top - it was 2006) and a navy skirt. On a girls holiday to Magaluf later that year I wore a white miniskirt, white shoes and white top. Back then colour co-ordination was BIG!
I felt the need to constantly colour co-ordinate all my outfits. I now look back at pictures and cringe, but that's fashion its forever changing.
I actually don't think I've colour co-ordinated my outfit ever since, I constantly mis-match colours trying to create new ways of styling the overly worn items hanging in my closet.
However, as mentioned above fashion is constanting evolving and changing and recently the colour co- ordinating trend has re-emerged but in a relevant and more stylish way. Its left me wanting to match all the colours in my wardrobe even if said wardrobe consists of Navy, Grey and Black pieces - well its definitely a starting point.

Ph Credit - lacooletchic, gudrunolof, alisonpeebles and manrepeller

An ode to my ASOS Bridal dress

As soon as I walked into an official "bridal" shop I knew I wasn't going to find a dress for me. The very lovely sales woman walked towards me with the biggest, voluptuous, netted dress I'd ever seen and I instantly shouted NO in my head. Whilst the dresses she showed me were beautiful and had sleeves (something I knew I wanted and needed for an October wedding), I knew these dresses were going to look ridiculous on me. 

In the shop I was advised that I may change my mind when I tried a few 'bridal' dresses on. I'm sure that can be true but to be very honest I didn't want that type of wedding dress. So I never tried any on, even after looking around a few dress shops. I don't regret it, I needed to feel like me. 

I've never been very Bridey and up until the point my boyfriend of 10 years proposed I'd never envisioned myself getting married, let alone in a huge white dress. 

At the beginning I thought about a coloured dress, I've always loved emerald green, that could

Work - but I knew I didn't want an extremely traditional wedding and a white/cream/ivory dress could add some tradition to the day. 

Many brides would not even think the highstreet/online highstreet was an option. Most brides want their dress to be original, a one of a kind and I get that but the latter comes at a price but the highstreet offers a whole array of gorgeous dresses at a fraction of the cost. 

I work in fashion and know what our Great British (online) high street has to offer. First I looked at designer white dresses that could pass for a wedding dress at Harvey Nichols then I searched John Lewis, Liberty, Monsoon and House of Fraser. Whilst theses outlets all had some beautiful dresses I didn't find that something unique that suited my style. 

ASOS BRIDAL 

ASOS is the brand I go too for my usual sartorial so why not for my wedding dress? I scrolled for many hours over many weeks before I found what those in the wedding business call 'the dress'. 

Yes searching for a dress online is time consuming. These dresses are not made to measure so you need to ensure it's a style that will suit your figure and in a fabric that looks expensive without actually being expensive. A plus side - around early spring new styles debut regularly giving lots of choice to choose from, finding the right dress was inevitable. It happened one Friday night, as soon as I saw it I loved it. But there was still the possibility that it wouldn't fit, we all know high-street fashion is not always true to size. When the DPD man knocked on my door some days later I was pleasantly surprised with how my purchase was packaged. No usual plastic ASOS packaging - instead a huge ASOS bridal box and garment bag containing my soon to be wedding dress.

I was very very lucky, the dress fit perfectly. I instantly knew I had picked the right dress. Yes, it's a high street dress so their are a few quality issues including some tucks around the bum area but overall this is a beautiful dress. The fabric quality and weight feel much more expensive than the £95 price tag.

On the day it received so many complements and I loved how unique this dress felt. I managed to portray my own personal style and most importantly without having to spend a fortune.  

Ph Credit - Eve Hopkinson Photography

Party Train

A couple of Friday's ago I joined the office girls and headed in to Manchester for Christmas cocktails and dinner in the Northern Quarter. The night was a blast but living outside the city becomes a drag when your evening comes to an abrupt end because you have to get the last train back to your semi rural abode. I love seeing trees and fields outside of my bedroom window but on nights like that it would be so convenient to live in the city. 

As I headed for the 10:29 train, one could have been fooled into thinking that the night was over, when in actual fact many similar individuals were continuing the party on the last Northern Rail Manchester to Leeds service. 

Yes, that festive time of year is upon us when the last train home on a Friday night becomes the party train - filled with post Christmas party goers ready to get an affordable ride home. Let's just say I didn't get the party train memo. I turned up with my bottle of M&S lemonade ready to avoid the wine hangover before I arrived at my destination in 50 minutes time. It seemed everyone else had turned up with something stronger. 

The journey home consisted of cider quaffing office workers singing Oasis anthems whilst banging the tune on the windows. I was actually enjoying the sing along until the girl sat on the floor next to me almost puked on my favourite gold heels. But we all get a little giddy during the festive season so possible puking is more than forgivable. 

It was my official office Christmas party last Friday and I was somewhat sad that I wasn't a member of the party train again. But a drunk ride home in a warm car with my sober Husband and Christmas music on full was just as entertaining.